Do you struggle to know when to share personal things? It’s too easy to shut off connection by not sharing, but it’s also easy to shutdown connection by oversharing. We need to strike a balance between authenticity and vulnerability with good boundaries. If you’re worried about shame, it is possible to find the right people to share with and not get shamed—the people are out there!
Connection is about connection to God and other people
Word “church” in the New Testament is just word for “assembly.”
And confession to others is a big part of how our faith works.
Refusing denial or sin identity.
Pitfalls of ever sharing or oversharing
Vomit share vs. total isolation—neither is vulnerability and change happens when we’re vulnerable.
Excuses we make: don’t want to be judged, or I just want my personal life with God—don’t need people. Maybe I’m not sure who’s safe to talk to about this hard thing in my life.
We need to strike a balance between authenticity and vulnerability and good boundaries.
It is possible to find the right people to share with and not get shamed—the people are out there!
1st thing to do is share all the stuff with God—be authentic there first.
Then, do safe tests—see if this person is safe.
We mention Brene Brown’s example from Daring Greatly about the first day of school and packing lunch.
Other people need to know where we’re at, so we can have team mates, to work on abiding together.
There are good support groups and systems out there.
One thing is to find a program that focused on graduating you out instead of just staying and getting caught up in the identity.
It’s also possible to get a friend or a group set-up that maintains itself—you don’t graduate out because you’re always talking about new life stages and new aspects of the struggle. You still see yourself rightly—and there is on-going vulnerability
The nice thing about choosing to hit bottom: those struggles very often become our passions, and our opportunity to minister to others.
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Liz’s book: Tales From A Spacious Place
Music by: Nu Skiffle Brigade used under creative commons license